sizzle bells

flew past, flying objects missing self container...

bottling persevative isotope medivac green apple jacks....

a gathering, filled with lines smooth and vast....

thought, a memory bubbles to a(some) surface...

my choice is graced with aromatic gathering....

time slips to accompany a new year....



"wassup rockers"

"there is no other way to say this(.)(?)"

there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?
there is no other way to say this.
there is no other way to say this?

...

what you know , what i know...

now i'm thinking of buying a car.

safeway
clean
organize
calls
downloads
facebook

the dance, a rehearsed movement.
many repetitions has clouded jugdements,
the first step is the same as the last,
decisions become piles, unfinished.
a high tolerance for tedium,
the fence seems high when standing close,
it keeps two parts divided,
setting it down,
examination,
changing the wind,
lost time and its all over now,
'eyes open gathering,
motivate mission, you are here.

action

start the day bobby.


winter break, kick ass, flip the script, looks better in here already.


well get up then......

the portfolio thing wasn't half bad.... i should write down that good idea before i forget.

still morning stiff muscles bad back cold weather

turning in my portfolio today and i'm free for a month!! i wonder if the finacial aid office is open. got to start listing again , keep good habits since your feeling better,now. there is a tree full of oranges outside my window. damn i have squeeze some!



can y0u dig it what i'm saying...

there is some much to do i feel overwelmed. so much to do...



i can't get enough of that song.

well if i stop this blog now i could get some breakfast . i always feel better after i grub...

1234567

when the storm clears up and the cool air, clear
to 2
an orange tree
lost keys, painful secret
pain and nothing
tomorrow
happy tree friends

choice to make

there was another party last night. it was fun for the rest of the roommates. have to change my routine, so i have to stay in my room. there was slutty dancing, refreshments, incense, all the best stuff but i'm never part of inner circle of fun.. then when there is a lull head roomies try and corner you into doing their housework. i have nothing witty to say about this kind of stuff, totally tired of drama. i'm getting irritated and taking it out on stuff, i need to change this up

CTU

-having a coffee somewhere
-go out dancing
-look for work
-look for work
-choose what classes to take
-clean my little room
-find some easy money
-school starts jan 20th "ish"
-go dancing
-dry out from these toxins, dry out
-look up law schools, requirements
-make my stupid food
-give goran those blank canvases, sorry ross.
-get to LA and get my stuff (if it's still there)

one moreFREESTYLE!!

two finals down and one to go. double checking with the prof. to see if turning late work would make any kind of difference ect, ect. oh, don't forget to email these guys and hash out a game plan. well i will not let this month go by without making many changes to better myself. please, please, please let me get what i want, please please. my little room has to get clean and this house is messier? how that happen? thats a stupid question. ah , getting tired .... this is good shit, take a power nap. maybe, just maybe i could catch a bit of the party later tonight.... i was getting ready when everybody was crashing this morning. it was pretty funny.... tomorrow go deal with monteith with a little work work work. well well well i feel good for no reason ... schools out
!
FREESTYLE

....

moving on is the same as giving up? i'm walking the floor over you>>> what the hell is going to be my grades... i guess driving a truck is gainful employment as they say. i want to travel and i don't take well to bosses and there eyes on my shiny donkey. blue eyes crying in the rain. blues come around in the evenning when the sun goes down.

a blog at 5:30 in the am. well i have this week and i guess looking for a job would be great. i should change my diet but right now i can't afford it. jason is pretty great roommate ! well the small things ect ect ect....

small rooms for rent

the last push till vacation. "orange juice" made special changes though very small, changes however a change was definately.... sleep came and went and now i think about how the "orange juice" had a kind of aftertaste. Low, droop-like, sagging, melancholy, well whatever... last night...

i still need to keep the focus and stay in my room for at least this week. start thinking of ways to keep busy when school gets out. j-o-b. well yeah maybe better food or excercise. i sure don't need to "blow off some steam" any time soon.


walk on down to uptown market, do some shopping. wonder if all us kids are goin to clean this house. the house is mess....later

h t

diplomatic, calm, boring, private, hungry, interested, guarded, friendly, appetite, football, move, restroom, patient, fair, mindful, even, focus, mingle,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,ht

the day before thanksgiving

go to the bank,
do laundry mat,
make weekly breakfast,
make weekly lunch,
email professors,
pack lunch,
norton rebate,
dayplan,
settle down,

why do i hang out at home when i could be at a club, stupid.

well i thought that writing something before i left the house would be good. i want to go dancing and get some blood flowing again. i don't even want to drink either, just move around and not at home. im going to hit up "fuck" this friday.




i could start recording songs, yeah !!!!!

cleveland show jumble

simulate, credits, door, embarressing, priceless, beer and ciggerrettes, lite diet, stick to the fat jokes, rollo died, dumb hulu commercial, dinner and brian eno..., never mention this to your mother, e.t. reference, my pocketwatch, whitetrash, drinking in the bar, p90x, cola, skinny jerks, exhausted, rascals and cheese, wisconsin, vblog, hell yeah i want that crazy butter, roommate trouble, come on america, stop being fat, beer run

lazers lips

"scan the topography vaacuum with a digital heart . "

reporting from a room in sacramento, californian. i have found a reason to leave the house. this room is messy. recycling is annoying! i want to socialize. pass my classes! there is a councellor that is dying to pick my classes for me, good ones. when i graduate, son of a, soo nice. here or there, a coffee kisses lips of lazers. walking around the city i own, my shoes yawn with the boredom of 10,000 things. vindication, whats that ? REDEMPTION, oh yeah recycling is annoying. whats stopping me from starting my day.

"hah,bummer"

camunkafoid, just seeing if your listenning. i hung out with a couple friends last night on the internet, it was weird but fun. i guess i'm an old fart but you could really keep in touch with people on this internet thinng. he had a vblog and it had scrolling comments while doing a live broadcast. i thought it was funkn cool. anyway, i'm procrasting while doing dishes, going to stay home much more often, so hello blog, hah.

ugh no dishes...

highspire and candy afterlife are cool bands. to me life can be summed up two ways, work and work. hah. if i had something to say at the end of that statement i wouldn't have so many problems , *hah,bummer*

anyway this was fun

journaling

i'm not sure if i feel good or bad. i'm not at all sure how to describe my mood. art is getting easier to do, in any respect. it may be, being more intuitive with concepts, techniques, ect...., possibly.. the many hours of practice helps. i haven't posted many things but i'm thinking of, thinking of, thinking of, thinking of, thinking of you guys... well now i'm getting hungry, something to work toward.

when i'm out of sorts and confused it usually means i have to dayplan and/or eat, desperately. so i may start tonight and continue tomorrow morning (dayplanning and/or eating). cool, its already working with the "clarity".

i should address this hunger. i'm moving into a small room next month. the rent is 125.oo per month. i might have to rent a storage unit until i could sift through my belongings and toss stuff, if that dad hasn't thrown it all away yet.

if anyone reads this and wants to sell a copy of microsoft office or P90x, let me know... lates

stuff and things

walking, jogging, stopping, looking, college, home, going, going, gone .... ugh, what , things are good but i'm a bit dizzy.. i really can't stop but i suppose if i realize it, that is a big step to ... something somewhere.... marching along, maybe i'll try and find a used P90x somewhere on ebay or .... i have this list that keeps getting longer with some pretty important stuff on there... i'm moving out of my room for 350/month to a room for 125/month.. i guess that needs to be my priority this month along with the school thing and the rest.... maybe i could go to the dentist in december or january... soon i hope. jeesh i need to see a councellor for my classes, fuckd... gosh wtf..... i got to get off this blog later

journal

so the semester is half over and i'm tired. it been a while since i've written. the roommates are good, things are smooth for the most part. there have a been some bumps but mostly getting used to this new lifestyle is ......

the internet is my new thing now, i have it in my room and i'm loving it... now i could apply for jobs without having to go to school.

painting and drawing is tiring at this rate, i hope i could get used to it. the jury is still out.

catching a little cold but i can't afford to get sick.....

happy halloween

journal

procrastinating ..... i have a day of organizing and a revolation that i need a driver's licence to move... that one hit me this morning as i woke up. *sigh* . it might be an issue if there is a time crunch with school and moving. the worse thing is i might have to do another trip to move and whatever else i didn't forsee... man, what a bone head move.

anyway, got to organize my days so things like above mention doesn't happen without prior knowledge.. mmmm coffee. had to spend my afternoon at the community college yesterday, no highlights.. i'm thinking im gonna have to get that studio. sharing a house has pros and cons, but i'm gonna follow my gut ... unless, something comes up. i haven't signed papers yet so if you're out there, i'm looking for awesome housing!

today is one of those inbetween days, so far. glad to be away from this mall soon. geez mall culture.. wondering if i'm going to spend my hours effectively in the near future. this organization day should quell some on my concern.

getting funny comments on the LILO pic. really i don't mean anything by it, just fun. thinking of buying a refurbished computer from dell or... got to run those adobe art programs, stepping up to the digital world. it should be interesting, maybe i could print out an art show like a friend of mine did years ago.... that was a cool show you did justin, i'm glad i got to go halves withya...

ok anyway, i'm guessing that im gonna be colliegate for my thirties so ... i really haven't prepared enough for this . these things will interest me when i'm settled in sacramento. wide awake in a sleepy town, can't wait. a cold beer at the FLAME !

yea, still procrastinating. damn that greyhound bus accident the other day was a scary story. that is too close , its the route i take ... anyway, no need to anger the gods on this one.

ooh a nice technical non fiction book, a tasty beer, a game of go and room full of instuments and recording equipment! well maybe soon, er got to start my day... erg

another coffee, i have to tone down my personality. i'm a little intense, no excuses just thinking how much i have to count to in my head to relax a bit.

listenning to this online radio station and it reminds me that i never got to go to that club downtown that played shoegaze stuff... that is life

ah coffee is working, this is a good day! declarative sentences, ahhhh. now i'm just wasting time. got to , uh, um, yeah

uh bloody chores, damnit. i might have to go on disposable kitchen stuffs vacay! oh or maybe a dishwasher is in my future, who knows.

my mind is spent on the possible futures, i only have to go to the bank for now so ill mentally count to 10 and organize later. today....

alright i'm out

eh

beating heart moves from here ,to here, to here, to there. speaking to me with a warm hold to join together .... johnny buys something, no one buys anything..... jewel hearts in a window, emo icon clicked by....... found my lighter,,,,,,, so what,,,,,,,, feeling like i just won a carnaval,,,,, why this is a graduation,,,,




august 11th, transfer orientation day @ CSUS........

cabin fever bob

living on a boulevard when a street suits,

your nobody till somebody loves you,




boredom is oppressing my community. trees will line my street in a future, in a tiny moment. it'll be nice to let go of some,,,,,,, space making my room, tiny room boy. there is too much energy and i need to run a marathon or something, get tired, bear! celebrate, P90X sweat factory! there is going to be so much getting done, i just hope that i'm ready inside, bob. watching events of sporting events are passive, leaving spectators enjoying enjoyment, to watch.

it would be nice to socialize at the clubs again, miss that. having some rain to feel can be nice too, miss that. CSUS Hornets, the hornets are alright. i'd love to rent a studio and get loud and junk, damn cabin fever. i should buy a double bass pedal (metal fingertapping!!!!)

new computer times, creative suite is going to make life very easy. THANK YOU(whisper). my oh my, inspiration overload. get ready, get ready, ready up. make plans. shmoke dat, a product is amazing to ponder, so now i have to GOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! go . goal. ...........

antsy

august can't come fast enough. i'm gonna have to keep myself busy or i'm gonna pull my hair out. i guess i could find some stupid job for a month , its just so annoying. sacramento, sacramento tree lined streets of letters and numbers. i want to curse, what for? im pretty stoked that i found some roommates , hope everything goes well . i can't wait , what am i going to do with myself. curse word! it it. tv is boring a hole in my head, dishwashing is better than tv. bobby needs a new pair of shoes. man , i am climbing up the walls...........

witch feelings

a want, then, are you? are you getting what guardian and babysitters . is this what you want to do? something is being done. there is enough to work faster. full tank is lifting more weight. you are not working hard enough. you have thoughts and feelings? you do then, you're not working hard enough. work brought to you by someone better then you. you are what you do, do so, do more. and, and, and, like, yeah. a better person made better money falling gracious. keep moving, you cant feel earthquakes. give all your money away, you don't want it. all the world kept your money to pay others to do work witch produce work in turn waters gardens. trade portions, count particles and smoke. work jesus, work jesus for your sins. if sin is anything. money will. give jesus away.

what a deal in luxury, you're so great. words are inventions to describe your greatness in meaning, you mean . people live forever , they do. look prove it. thats what you want and your answers will work for jesus. crater works for me, god works for me, creator works for free. how many gods are there?

school travels

sacramento has changed if the rumors are true. so good. so glad. 'cant wait till august, damn what am i going to do with myself. looking for a job in vein but at least i did all i can do. spending money would be cool before the semester starts ! already getting stoked just writing about it, i know its not that important but.......the rest. thank you friends all over the place for keeping me from insane, the noun. thanx guys, cheers !

well now i have to get rid of those pictures on that old fashion camera i've been holding on to for several years now. pictures of bunnies , lighthouses, and the mary of queen ! should start packing, organizing, drinking less. so much to do , so much to do .

too much going on to go on typeing

think thin

sitting in a station comparing choices to spring. john douglas has a coffee comparring choices in a station. the walls hold choices dividing all spaces in a station leopard mammals ring long tall ghosts fogged, sits down in with eyes serene and empty "great to see you johnny" "how long has it been" she exclaimed. "a very long time, alice" " math is my subject, i don't know how long its been" said john with non chalant choices , comparing the spaces "the chicken is getting cold" alice says as she starts to cry. " its been fifteen years, ". "alice whats wrong" , johnny puts down his comparison. " whats is it?"

a train pulls in and people begin by stepping the step steps toward the train as it slows, the choice to sit in this station has changed to a complete stop. johnny looks to alice and sees her empty seat. quick glances come up emty. is that her? she is step stepping the step to a weepy, 3 inch heel choice comparing comparisons, with each step . clink, clak, clak, clakk, the train begins to cry as she leaves the station.

footsteps

place the time will taste honey and wine strawberry tan. its nice exactly, merciful. show the beat on a shore. out of reach, closing the shore. paddle more, 'til you reach the shore.


i am the key, you are the door, i am the sea, you are the shore. pull out the mirrors, burn out the street, the boiling gulf, pour the lost in a mess. jump in and jump out, you can see me through. enjoy the line, flat horizon. behind your eyes the video has left the building.

good news

abandonned the paintbrush for technology, makes life easier ! what will i do with the free time? planning on showing the art well sooner then expected however not soon enough. also planning some kind of group show with bands or dj's. this is going to be done while in sacramento attending csus. Details of all this will take time to sort out, all the details.

"my interest is in the future because i am going to spend the rest of my life there." - charles f. kettering

2

seeing work that has taken a very long time coming along is great and bitter sweet. seeing also that a mind can work faster than the body can perform makes for some concern because, it renders the external work inferior to the internal. writing may be the only alternative to this labor intensive work of creating with simple tools and techniques. this art show with its beginnings in 2003 has taken too much time. time isn't a luxury in this sense. the sum of its part can be better suited doing things that benefit more in the short term.

it reminds me, i should look for a job before moving to sacramento. spending money would be nice.

1

yeah baby, this is where i type at length................(smiling)